DREGULATOR, 2006 VOL. V #12

It wasn’t just the Boston Priests lying prostrate before the Altar of Shame, this week, Fiends.
Is it me, or has Jesus actually killed the world’s sense of humor for some higher purpose? It is hard to believe that at 47, Madonna can still pull shock out of the Christians, but, plucky Madge – God love her – built herself a big crucifix out of disco-ball tiles and hung herself from something that looks like men’s room fixtures. It looked like something you’d see if Busby Berkeley directed “The Passion of the Christ.”
“She’s a phony, desperate has-been,” one clearly important showbiz “insider” told the Globe.
“It’s extremely disappointing that Madonna feels that entertaining means belittling Christ in such a belligerent way,” said Randy Sharp, director of special projects for the American Family Association.
The AFA, as you may know, hates The Gay and wants the Constitution to reflect this. The AFA also initiated, along with 20 “pro-family groups,” a boycott against Ford motors (which also makes Jaguar, Volvo, Land Rover, Mazda, Lincoln and Mercury), because they promote civil equality for their GLBT employees.
Hey, that’s good for America, if you like economic terrorism. “GLBT”, in case you weren’t hip to these things, is an acronym for Gay, Lesbian, Bacon and Tomato – and they have been a nutritious staple of autoworkers since the early 1950’s.
Christian American families just can’t abide the idea of a gay person having installed the brake proportioning valves in their Mercury Grand Marquis – and frankly, if I were a gay person, and I knew I was installing brakes for the AFA, I can’t say I’d do the very best job I could do.
English professor Dr. Mel Seesholtz of Penn State, on civilrights.org, writes that the message of discrimination and intolerance put forth by groups like the AFA is not being lost on the youth: case in point, a 20-year old student of Seesholtz expressing this sentiment most succinctly in an essay on gender psychology:
“I have beaten up faggots before, and I used to feel guilty – not anymore! Bush says fags don’t count, so I guess it’s cool to do it.” …
Indeed.
Seesholz sez, of the AFA, “Their dogmatic theo-economic agenda is as megalomaniacal and blind as the theo-political one.”
Which makes total sense.
Introducing my new insult-comic mascot: Theo! The Megalomaniac Conservative Politico-Economist Dog.